Parenting Plans in the Time of COVID

COVID 19 has impacted virtually every aspect of our daily lives. It has forced us to face challenges we have never considered before.

These challenges include how to interpret parenting plans.

If you are reading this, then chances are that you and another parent have children together, and you are operating under what we call a "parenting plan" in Washington family law. This is essentially a court order that directs the parents as to the residential schedule for their children, as well as other various aspects of child-rearing. If a custody or divorce case is going on right now, the plan might be temporary, or if the litigation is over, it may be a permanent plan.

Either way, these are court orders and should not be disregarded lightly.

With that in mind, parents are faced with some hard choices during this epidemic because parenting plans rarely contain any language that would apply to something like COVID 19.

What happens if a child exposed to COVID during your time? Do you keep him at your house or give him back like the court ordered plan requires? What if the other parent does not follow the state and local rules for social distancing? Do you still have to turn over the child, knowing that the child might be exposed to unsafe practices?

In my law practice in Snohomish County, I get these questions all the time. Now that we are a few months into the epidemic, I have litigated these issues repeatedly and I can provide some insight as to how they are typically addressed by our local judges and commissioners.

Here are some key points to keep in mind as you navigate these issues:

COVID isn't justification to reduce parenting time

Realize that courts very strongly believe that parents should get all their custodial time. Deviations from the court's orders should only occur in true emergency circumstances. With that in mind, one of the most common things I have seen is that courts punish people that use this epidemic as an excuse to deprive another parent of their custodial time.

When COVID dictates a potential quarantine, I have seen courts address this issue in one of two ways. The first (and by far the most common) is the "two house quarantine," where the parties keep their normal residential schedule, but the child quarantines with each parent in their home as recommended by local guidelines. The second method is the "make-up quarantine," where a child spends the entire quarantine with a designated parent, and makes up the lost custodial time with the other parent afterwards. These long trips away from the other parent are often hard on the children, so this is the less preferred method. If this method is used, it is common for courts to require that there be frequent video calls and phone contact with the parent that is away from the child.

If you do make the decision to keep the child away from the other parent for safety reason, it is imperative that you be totally clear (and put in writing) that you will agree to any make-up time needed, so a court understands that there is no attempt to improperly deprive the other party of their residential time.

When the other parent will not be safe

Parents disregarding safety recommendations is a real problem. I have a lot of clients who come to me afraid to give their child to the other parent for fear there will be unnecessary risks taken. In my own caseload, this seems to be the main point of contention between co-parents.

Do not simply refuse to allow custody time with a parent deviating from these requirements. If the issue is later litigated, the Court is going to want to see that you went to authoritative sources to find the best practices, shared them with the other party, and only refused to allow time if the other party refused to implement those practices. Even then, any witholding should always be done with the caveat that make-up time will be given after the dispute is resolved.

Communication is key in these times. If your child has a pediatrician, obtain the pediatrician's recommendation and share it with the other party and ask them to abide by it. Often this will carry substantial weight with the other parent, and cut off lengthy arguments about what they two parties may have read on the news. If there is no option for a pediatrician, there are state or local guidelines directing safety practices. You should review those and share them with the other party in your discussions. In most instances, sharing information from these sources will resolve the problem because the other party is going to have a hard time justifying a decision to ignore these instructions.

If the disagreement persists, though, it is important to be able to show that you found out what the best practices were, communicated them to the other party, and that the other party refused to abide by those safety practices.

Emergency relief if you cannot agree

If you and the other parent cannot agree on safety practices and you have made a written record of attempts to work the disagreement out (letters / emails / texts stating your position and the data supporting it), you will have to escalate matters. Read your parenting plan carefully, and see if it has a dispute resolution provision. Most plans have a requirement that the parties mediate or arbitrate issues before going to court. If those things are in your parenting plan, utilize them.

If no provisions exists, or if you need immediate relief, it is likely time to seek out an attorney to assist you with getting a court order mandating safety practices for the child. Hopefully, if you have followed the advice above and suggested expert-approved safety precautions, you should be in good shape to succeed in a court room.

As always, the purpose of this blog is to provide general information, and should not be a substitute for legal advice for your specific circumstances from a qualified professional.

Good luck parenting in these difficult times.